No Comprende.

I always think it's hilarious when I hear someone yell "shut up!" to a dog.

Wouldn't, couldn't, shouldn't, didn't, isn't, hadn't, can't.

How come willn't isn't a word

Illuminati.

Man, I have been such a big fan of Sara Bareilles for such a long time. I used to love her when she was called Sarah Maclachlan, Fiona Apple, and Norah Jones

Tales From the Crip.

I remember when I was in high school, there was this guy named Donald. Donald was the biggest gangster at school, everyone was scared of him. He dressed like a G, acted like a G, and always had a mean look on his face. 

There was also this other kid, John. John was tall, skinny, and super goofy looking. John was the total polar opposite of Donald. He was outspokenly Christian and wanted to be a police officer. He even took part in a ride-along/junior cadet program with our local sheriff station after school. 

Because of this, Donald never let an opportunity pass to give John shit. He would mock him, yell insulting things at him in public, and take every opportunity he could to intimidate John.

In the mornings, we would have a 10 - 15 minute break between 2nd and 3rd period classes, and most of the student body gathered on this second floor walkway just to hang out and socialize. 

I remember seeing John hunched down talking to two girls, laughing and joking. I remember seeing Donald approach, with two friends to his side, and beeline straight to John. Donald bent down and got right in John's face. He said something to him, and judging by the scowl on Donald's face, it wasn't anything nice. He continued talking shit to John, despite John not turning to look at him once. Everyone began to take notice, and we all saw Donald accentuate his shit-talk with a forward nudge into John. Donald's friends stood there laughing.

We all watched John immediately stand up, throw five deliriously fast punches, and connect with Donald's face with each and every single one of them. This boy had hands. He threw several more punches and each of them connected with Donald's face. Donald stumbled backwards, a stream of blood now coming from his nose, and I remember there was a distinct moment where Donald looked around and realized nearly everyone at the school was standing there watching this. I think I even met eyes with him briefly. His two friends stood there doing nothing. John stepped forward again and connected with two more punches to Donald's face before two guidance counselors came running over. John immediately stopped, picked up his backpack, and yielded to follow the counselors to their office. 

There was a buzz among everyone. We had all just witnessed the school's biggest gangster get his ass beat by this goofy-looking wannabe nerd cop. It was amazing. Donald too, was led off by the counselors. 

From what we heard and saw, Donald was suspended and John was still allowed to come to school, however he had to serve some detention for his actions. Donald's reputation, however, took a major hit. He wasn't as scary as he was before. And he never fucked with John again.

Moral of the story: fuck people named Donald. 

Cheeseballs.

Don't fuck with TMZ, man. They're more than just some tabloid TV show.

Follow this hyna.

http://www.instagram.com/michaelatranova/

Bootypants

Steve Kerr gettin exposed. You got Kevin Durant and Klay Thompson but you can't beat these sorry teams? Come on, bruh.

Time Exists.

I have this constant fear that a natural disaster will strike while I'm chillin' in my pajamas, forcing me to walk around a rescue center or a futuristic wasteland with people staring at my clothes and wondering.