Unng!

i used to take a shit like clockwork.
every morning, i'd get up, smoke a cigarette, have some juice, then take a shit.
now with this "career thing" i haven't been shitting at all.
every morning, i get up, wash up, get ready, and take off to work.
i don't smoke my morning cigarette until i'm in the car and heading to work.
the first cigarette used to help me induce shitting, and it still does-- only now i have to hold it back because i'm in the car heading to work. i spend half the morning debating whether i should relieve my bowels or not, and since i work in a small office-- i don't.
the problem with not cleaning out your bowels on a regular basis, is that when you do clear them out daily, your shits are soft and fresh. now that i'm shitting maybe once or twice a week, they come out as almost painfully released logs of hardness. they don't come out easily, either. it doesn't feel that great. i'm pretty sure i wouldn't enjoy gay, anal sex, because i feel as though i'm practically having it now. it's not fun.